Forgive and Forget: Are they one and the same?

What if you forgive someone who doesn’t seem to want to forgive you? What if someone claims to be a repented Christian yet is unforgiving and refuses to change their thoughts? I believe that forgiveness is a decision, yet it is also something God expects from us. Not only does he expect it, He is very firm about it. He even commands it! Even if the offender doesnt desire forgiveness, and / or has no desire to forgive and forget himself, God demands that we do!

According to Matthew 18:21, we are expected to forgive seventy times seven, a number that symbolizes boundlessness. A friend of mine told me that the best way to handle forgiveness is to do it immediately. Don’t allow things to have any time to fester. That may be easier said than done for many.
                        

Matthew 5:44 But I say to you, Love your enimies, bless those who curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for those who despitefully use you, and persecute you.      
A Christian who refuses to forgive will find his fellowship with God hindered in more ways than one.                                                                
Matthew 6:15 But if you fail to forgive someone for their tresspasses, neither will your heavenly Father forgive yours. There are other consequences as well, such as bitterness and loss of reward.

Hebrews 12:14-15 in the Passion Translation sums it up nicely: 14 In every relationship, be swift to choose peace. (It doesnt say some, it says every) and run swiftly towards holiness, for those who are not holy, will not see the Lord. 15.Watch over one another to make certain that no one misses the revelation of God’s Grace. And make certain no one lives with a root of bitterness sprouting within them which will only cause trouble and poison the hearts of many 

The Bible says all is forgiven, God does not remember our wickedness.  However, as humans we can’t always selectively delete specific things from our memories or forget hurtful things people do or say to us, but we can make that truly important decision to forgive them without making excuses for not doing so. And we do make excuses.

 (Hebrews 8:12) Although we strive to be more and more like God, we fail miserably. (Fall short, Romans 3:23)

Here are a few excuses that come to mind, some I’ve thought myself: “Maybe I could forgive them if I understood why they did it”. “What is the point of forgiving them when their not even sorry” “They could care less if I forgive them or not” “They refuse to forgive me, so what good does it do for me to forgive them?”

God may not remember our wickedness, but he is still All Knowing! He forgives our sins, and having been forgiven, we are justified (made right with God, or declaired righteous)

Heaven is ours as if we never sinned. If we belong to Him, through faith in Jesus Christ, God does not condem us for our sins. So in that sense, God “forgives and forgets”.
Romans 8:1 Therefore there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ 

Be in Christ 
If by “forgive and forget” we chose to forgive and forget for the sake of Jesus and move on with that individual, then we are making a wise and Godly decision. However, if we “forgive and forget” thinking that it means we can forget what happened to us, (this is applicable in cases of rape or a violation of trust by someone in your work or home; for reasons such as infidelity or theft); and behave as if it never happened we’re making a mistake. It did happen and although God asks that we forgive them, He most certainly doesn’t expect us to behave as if nothing happened. Don’t confuse forgiveness with trust. They are two very different things.

Proverbs 22:3 
The prudent see danger and take refuge but the simple keep going and pay their penilty.     

 Jesus told his followers that when they found themselves in the company of unrepentant sinners to be “shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves” Matthew 10:16 

 In other words, we must be be willing to forgive, yet cautious. Being cautious doesnt mean we haven’t forgiven, it simply means we are not God and we can’t see what is inside of another persons heart. We’re feeling our way through life and we all make mistakes. Mistakes made by people in our everyday lives should be forgiven for their sake as well as for the  sake of our own hearts.
Proverbs 4:23 Guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.  

On a more personal note, Anytime I write a blog, I approach it as a ‘learning experience’ that I desire to share. I pray it never comes acrossed in anything close to “a know it all’ perspective” In fact, often times this old heart of mine is learning as I write.
Be Blessed

Sanctuary of Tranquility: When God Calls Us Into Seclusion

Sanctuary of Tranquility: When God Calls Us Into Seclusion: There are times in our lives when God knows that the only way we will become what he wants us to become is by isolating us; by pulling us...

When God Calls Us Into Seclusion

There are times in our lives; especially if we’re truly blessed, when Jesus knows that the only way we will become what he wants us to become is by isolating us; by pulling us away from the influence of others and putting us in a position where the only true answers we get concerning our lives come from him. During this process, he allows us to discover a few of the details he’s aware that need our attention. It can be overwhelming to discover the very fine details concerning our lives that he brings to our mind. Things he wants us to recall, things we have shoved deep inside of our hearts and minds, the very things that shaped our personalities and characteristics, both good and bad. It is his intention to help us work through these things so that we can move on with the plans he has for our lives.  


“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.”  Jeremiah‬ ‭29:11‬ ‭ESV‬‬

These are very important times; some of which can be painful, but he is right there with us every moment to get us through, and in the process he changes us, making us more and more capable of his goals for our lives. He rotates people in and out of our lives for seasons and reasons that we may never understand. He knows exactly where we need to live, why we need to have specific jobs or join organizations or groups. There’s a reason for everything, as he has a master plan for each of us with experiences we need to endure that will change our attitudes and beliefs, and he works with the decisions we make, both the good and bad, making them all into something benificial for our lives. He knows exactly who will provide the perfect encouragement to us when we are close to giving up, and who will be around to open our eyes to the truth about our own thoughts and behavior. He whispers things to us that become part of our own thoughts, and he can and will answer any question we ask him in his time. If he allows something to hurt us for a season, it is because he has a plan that will turn  that pain into something beautiful.


Ecclesiastes 3:1111 He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also, he has put eternity into man's heart, yet so that he cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to the end

I sometimes struggle to fully understand the free will thing. Although we have Free Will, when we belong to Jesus we long to please him, so we seek his face constantly to ask him for direction, as his ways, are higher than our own, thus always perfect. 

You see, that old expression, "There's no turning back" is true. You can't change your devotion to him and you wouldn't change it even if you could, and the reason is simple.You know that he knows e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g and he would never steer you wrong. He may allow certain difficulties if he believes we will benifit, but he loves us and wants our lives to be full of joy. He is not only your very best friend, He is God Almighty.

Being isolated with God can be lonely if you allow it to be, but if you press in and treat him like the best friend that he truly is, you will experience changes and miracles that will draw you even closer to him and you won't ever want it any other way ever again.

It's kind of crazy in a fantastic way!

Things will begin to happen and things will change; unexpected things. 

Always expect the unexpected with God.

When they happen, you will know it's him. There is no explaining it to anyone who doesn't know him, so you just smile, knowingly and keep it to yourself. 

God is so amazing.

There will be, however, moments, hours and days when he is trying to make a point with you. Sometimes the things he wants us to learn are not easy, and anything but fun.

Often times they are even very painful. Yet, painful with the knowledge that he is forcing you to open your eyes and see things, do things his way, instead of your own.

Good luck getting mad at him or trying to make him see things your way. He will listen and he will see, but that won't change his mind unless and until he is good and ready. 

When he is determined to change something about you, he wont give up until its accomplished!  His perfect will will be done 

He is always successful in every single one of his endeavors

Always! So you can do things the easy way, or you can do things the hard way, that choice is ultimately yours. 


He is destined to change us if we belong to him. asking him to change you is a brave request! He listens and is more than ready to take you up on your request. Be ready for some amazing transformations to occur. You will look back and shake your head when you think about how different you have become. 

1 John 5:14-15 14  And this is the confidence that we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will he hears us. 15 And if we know that he hears us in whatever we ask, we know that we have the requests that we have asked of him.

Don't let that scripture fool you, God is not Santa Claus. Santa may be described as having a few of God's characteristics but they are worlds apart. The one characteristic that truly defines Jesus is that "if we ask anything according to HIS will, He hears us". 

It must be his will for he doesn't hand out perfect gifts unless they are his perfect will. 

Believe me when I tell you, receiving that perfect will is tougher than it sounds.

If he has placed you in a difficult situation, it's all yours until he is ready to change it. 

Have you ever asked for something and been told 'No'? 

I have, more times than I can count. Don't pout, Father knows best. 

Remember, No request to God comes back void. 

You will receive what he determines to be the perfect response when he is good and ready, and it's not always what you thought you wanted, but it always comes and it's always perfect. God is not going to just hand you something without it being precisely what he wants it to be and you can rest on that. 

Because he created us, he can use his finely tuned wisdom and knowledge to plant dreams and ideas into our minds and without a second thought we come to believe that those thoughts and dreams were our own idea. We are so determined to believe we are in charge of everything that we fail to give him the credit he deserves. That is the pure and simple truth.

Don't misunderstand what I just wrote; "He did not make us to be mechanical robots that just march around doing preordained things. Our Father God created us to have fellowship with him. It is our birthright to have an actual relationship with our God."(From the book Hearing God by James W. Goll) But it takes two to complete that relationship and the more time you spend alone with him, the greater that relationship will become. Go into seclusion with God. Talk to him. read the Bible, listen to podcasts from good teachers and ask him to change anything about you that he knows needs changing and you are guaranteed to see miracles in your own life. I promise.